Crayon Creation
The 1958 Pittsburgh International Exhibition of Contemporary Painting and Sculpture
California :
The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail.
A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor’s dog, then bites the Governor.
1. The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie “Bambi” and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.
2. He calls animal control . Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the State $2,000 testing it for diseases and $5,000 for relocating it.
3. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $2,000 testing it for diseases.
4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged. All of it taxpayer money.
5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $800,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.
6. The Governor spends $5,000,000 in state funds implementing a “coyote awareness program” for residents of the area.
7. The State Legislature spends $20 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
8. The Governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $1,500,000 to hire, train and fund the pension of a new agent with additional special training re: the nature of coyotes.
9. PETA protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $50 million suit against the State.
And wins.
SOUTH DAKOTA :
The Governor of South Dakota is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A Coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.
1. The Governor shoots the coyote with his personal pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $0.50 [of his own money] on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.
2. The Buzzards eat the dead coyote.
